Deconstructing Toxic Body Image Ideals: Steps to Improve Your Relationship with Your Body

In today's world, we are constantly bombarded with images and messages about what our bodies "should" look like. Social media influencers, movies, television, fashion magazines reinforce toxic ideals of beauty that are impossible to achieve. Most of the clients I see in my practice struggle with body dissatisfaction and negative self-image. In a society that is always telling us how our bodies are “wrong,” it can feel like a losing battle to try to love or even tolerate the skin we are in. Improving body image isn’t about changing your appearance; it’s about changing your perspective. Here are some steps you can take to deconstruct toxic messages we all get from society that tell us we are not enough.

1. Recognize and Challenge Unhealthy Messages

The first step to improving your body image is becoming aware of the harmful messages you are consuming. Media, advertisements, and even casual conversations can reinforce the idea that only certain body types are valuable. Start by critically analyzing the content you encounter daily. Ask yourself:

• Whose bodies are being celebrated?

• Are these standards realistic or achievable for most people?

• How does this make me feel about my own body?

• Who is benefiting from me trying to look this way? (hint…hint…usually it is some sort of company that makes money off you feeling bad about yourself)

Once you’ve identified these toxic ideals, challenge them. Remind yourself that beauty is subjective, and no single standard can encompass the full range of human bodies. Think about who makes money and benefits off your self-loathing and negative feelings about your body.

2. Curate Your Media Consumption

Social media is a powerful tool, and while it can spread harmful beauty ideals, it can also be a space for body positivity and inclusivity. Take control of your feed:

• Unfollow accounts that promote unhealthy or unrealistic body standards.

• Follow accounts that celebrate body diversity, body neutrality, and self-compassion.

By surrounding yourself with more inclusive and uplifting messages, you create a more supportive environment that fosters body acceptance rather than comparison.

3. Practice Body Neutrality

Body neutrality encourages you to focus on what your body can DO rather than what it looks like. Instead of obsessing over appearance, shift your attention to how your body supports you in everyday life. Your body allows you to move, create, experience pleasure, and connect with others. It’s about appreciating your body for its functionality rather than aesthetic value.

Here are some body-neutral affirmations to try:

• “My body carries me through life, and that’s enough.

• “I am more than my appearance.”

• “My worth is not determined by how my body looks.”

4. Reframe Negative Self-Talk

We often internalize the societal messages around us and start to speak to ourselves in ways that mirror those ideals. Notice when you're engaging in negative self-talk or being overly critical of your body. Once you catch these thoughts, practice reframing them:

• Instead of: “I hate how I look in this outfit.”

• Reframe as: “This outfit doesn’t fit my body comfortably, and that’s okay.”

Be compassionate with yourself, and remember that it's normal to have moments of discomfort, but they don’t define your worth.

5. Engage in Embodiment Practices

Sometimes, body image struggles can cause us to feel disconnected from our bodies. Engaging in embodiment practices—activities that help you tune into and connect with your body—can help bridge that gap. This can include yoga, dance, mindful movement, or any physical activity that allows you to experience your body in a non-judgmental way. The goal is not to change your body but to experience it from the inside out.

6. Focus on What Your Body Needs

Rather than focusing on how your body looks, shift your attention to what your body NEEDS. This includes:

• Nourishing your body with balanced meals that give you energy.

• Resting when your body is tired.

• Listening to your body’s cues for movement, hunger, and comfort.

Taking care of your body in these ways reinforces the idea that your body deserves respect and kindness, no matter its shape or size.

7. Connect with Supportive Communities

Surrounding yourself with supportive and body-positive people can make a world of difference. Whether it’s friends, family, or an online community, engaging with others who promote body diversity and self-acceptance can help you feel less alone in your journey. If you’re struggling with deep-seated body image issues, working with a therapist can also provide personalized support to help you unlearn toxic beliefs and rebuild a healthier relationship with your body.

Final Thoughts: Body Image is a Journey

Improving body image isn’t about waking up one day and loving everything about your body. I often tell clients that body image it is one of the hardest things to change when we are working on our relationship with ourselves because there is so much reinforcement from society of negative messages. To make progress, we slowly deconstruct the harmful ideals society has placed on us and focus on learning to treat ourselves with kindness, patience, and respect. Your body is the vessel through which you experience life—it doesn’t need to conform to societal standards to be worthy of love and care.

You are more than a body. Your value isn’t determined by your appearance, and embracing your body is a powerful act of self-liberation.

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By taking these steps, you can begin to dismantle the toxic beauty standards that have been ingrained in our culture and move toward a healthier, more accepting view of your body.

If you want to improve your body image, reach out for a consultation today. I would love to help you feel more at peace with the skin you are in.